Drivers Are Assholes
Hello there my fellow assholes,
I do believe I have touched on this subject before but, I say it is worth talking about again so here I go.
How many of you have been driving down the road, minding your own business when some idiot comes up behind you and tailgates you? I am certain that atleast 80 percent of you will say that this has happened. Why is it that 99 percent of these fools are WOMEN? I don't care if this bothers the females who read this because it is just a fact that women seem to be the ones who do it more often than anyone else. It makes no difference of the age of the woman either. I have been tailgated by old hags and young stupid girls. They all have some kind of death wish I swear.
Before you comment and say, "you just drive too slow", think again, I usually go a little faster than the posted speed limit and even when I'm going 80mph down the highway, THERE THEY ARE! They still do it even when they have a clear passing lane on the left! Is it because they want to be close to me cause I'm so damn charming? Yeah I know, thats not it. What reason do these assholes have for riding my bumper? Is it because women drivers just don't know how to drive? Or maybe its cause being behind the wheel of a car makes them feel powerful or something.
Now to be fair, I shall now attack all young drivers. Young drivers are about the most pathetic piles of sludge on the planet. They drive like idiots, pull out in front of you and then look at you as though you were the one who made a mistake haha. What is with all of these morons these days? Is this something that has been going on forever and I am now just seeing it? I say that the driving age should be set at 25 years old for all of our safety. I have heard some people say that the age should be 18 or 21 but that is just stupid. Why you ask? Well, at 18 years of age, these so called "adults" are still just immature children with the "adult" tag placed on them. Think about when you were 18, how mature were you? If you say that you were mature at 18 your parents must have beat the living spit out of you or your parents were nuns and priests. OR, and this is probably the case, you probably just THINK you were mature back then (or think you are for the younger readers). As for age 21, ARE YOU SERIOUS???? Let me break this one down, Uh, 21 years of age is when all of these young punk asses are legally allowed to drink. Do you honestly feel that age 21 would be a real smart idea to unleash these bastards on the roads? HELL NO. Now, with my plan at age 25, everything is worked out perfectly. By that age, they have matured a little more and, by that time, they have had enough of the drinking themselves into a stooper and they may not be as likely to drive drunk all the time. Some jackass will be thinking, "well how will these people under the age of 25 get to work?". Well, there are these things called cabs and buses for one or maybe a car pool or maybe they can get a damn bike or have one of their older co-workers come get their stupid asses. Sure, that may be a pain in the ass but ya know, I say its much better than them killing someone that I care about. Honestly, I could care less if they kill themselves but usually, it is the young idiot driver that causes other "good" people to die because they thought it would look cool to pull out in front of people.
Why is it that there are so many idiot humans out there driving around? Seriously, people die every few minutes in car crashes and you would think that we as people (assholes) could come up with some sort of plan to attack this issue harder so maybe not as many people need to die.
Maybe we should make all cars out of rubber and have the engines only go about 10 mph. Then instead of dying when we crash, we can all just giggle as if we were at the amusement park on the bumper cars. That may sound stupid but seriously, what is more stupid, bumper cars made of rubber or needless death because of the assholes who dont know how to drive? If you say I am wrong, you are just a stupid asshole.
Have a happy labor day you ass spankers and try not to run my ass off the road. 
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